Did you know that teaching your kids how to make chocolate chip cookies can build self-confidence?

That’s right. Any time your kids have an opportunity to learn something new and to create something exciting it builds self-confidence. And what can be more exciting for a young child than chocolate chip cookies!

Many people don’t realize that self-confidence is a skill that can be developed. One of the best ways to help kids build self-confidence is to give them opportunities to learn something new – to challenge themselves and stretch outside of their comfort zone. Succeeding at something new leads to a sense of accomplishment which, in turn, builds self- confidence.

Give your children as many opportunities to be successful as you can find. Start small with things like putting together a simple model, making a tie-dye t-shirt, and yes, making chocolate chip cookies. Even household activities such as raking the front lawn, folding their own laundry, and setting the table can build confidence.

Remember that success begets success. And it just might be yummy too.

You may have heard statements like these before…

• As soon as I have more money…
• As soon as I lose weight…
• As soon as I’m a little older

…then I’ll go for my goal!

When deciding the “perfect time” to go for your goal… you must look out for sneaky dream-stealer called conditional thinking.

Conditional thinking occurs when you think that something must happen before you go for your goal.

To spot conditional thinking, listen for the words, “if” followed by “then” (may also hear the words “when” followed by “then”).

Here are some more specific examples:

• “If my boss wasn’t such a jerk, then I’d enjoy my job.”
• “When I lose 10 pounds, then I’ll buy new clothes.”
• “If I was younger, then I would start a business.”
• “If I was older, then I would start a business.”
  

The problem with conditional thinking is that you become a victim to your circumstances or limiting beliefs versus standing in your power to create what you really want in your life.

You see, the secret to creating what you really want is to declare your dreams based on what you truly want in life…and then managing away the circumstances.

The mistake that most people make is that they look at their current circumstances and then whittle down their dreams down to fit within those constraints.

So how can you break up conditional thinking?

• The first step is to recognize it is happening and to challenge the statement or belief. Are you really too old to start a business? Mary Kay Ash started her company, Mary Kay Cosmetics, when she was 50 years old!

• The second step is to take action…even if it’s just one small step in the direction of your goal. Action puts a “stake in the ground” and lets the universe know that you are serious about achieving that goal. It also triggers the reticular activating system of your brain to look out for anything that can help you achieve that goal.

• And the third step is to reprogram your self-talk. Reframe the conditional thinking into an affirmation that works for you. Instead of saying ““I’m too old to go back to school.” You could say, “I’m a lifelong learner and taking action on my next big dream.” (By the way, if you’re 40 years old today…in 4 years you’re going to be 44. You can either be 44 years old with a college degree or 44 years old without one…time is going to pass either way.)

The perfect time to go for your goal is now…even if it just means taking a small step in the direction of that goal!

Take time to teach your kids about the dangers of conditional thinking.

When they learn how to spot and shift conditional thinking, it will enable them to stand in their power and go for their goals versus becoming victim to current circumstances or limiting beliefs.

One of the tools that has helped our family is “The List”.

Each morning my kids make a list of several things they must finish before they can play.

Topping the list are the usual – get dressed, comb their hair, and brush their teeth.

Then there might be two or three other items such as put away their laundry, complete their worksheets, or spend 30 minutes reading.

With the list, they know what must be done – it can take them 30 minutes or it can take them 3 hours…it’s up to them. The faster they complete their list the more free time they have.

When they ask if they can play my response is – “Is your list done?” They always know the answer and I’m not the bad guy.

Give it a try and let me know what you think…

Good luck!